The Chicago Bears aka "The Repo Man"

"The Repo-Man" used to sneak around the ring trying to steal the belongings of his opponents. He never did anything for himself as far as winning but he screwed his opponents over by stealing their stuff. The Bears have pretty much done the same thing. They beat the Lions on the last game of the season in 2000 to keep Detroit out of the playoffs. They've beaten Minnesota at least once in each of the last five seasons. They don't factor in the playoff picture themselves but they always seem to effect the playoff picture in some way.

I like this comparison for another reason too. "The Repo Man" used to be Smash from Demolition. He brought the hammer down on many hapless opponents. He was tough and rugged. The Repo Man was weak but Smash was a powerhouse. The Bears are weak but they proved in 2001 that they're a tough team. Brian Urlacher is a bruising linebacker. The defense has the potential to be stifling. The offensive line is enormous. With, John Tait, Olin Kreutz, Fred Miller, and Ruben Brown, the Bears are going to have their way with defensive lines. Cedric Benson and Thomas Jones are both hard-nosed running backs who will run people over. The Bears have the potential to be tough. I think a lot of teams are counting on beating the Bears. I think they're going to surprise a few teams. They'll have an aggressive running game with a slightly above average defense. Worse teams have made the playoffs.


The Repo Man's alter ego is on the right.

The determining factor for the Bears was going to be Rex Grossman. Grossman missed most of last season with an injury. As it so happens, he'll miss most of this season with a broken ankle. The candidates for the starting job include such superstars as Chad Hutchinson, Kurt Kittner, and Kyle Orton. To be honest, it doesn't matter who wins the job. They all have a similar skill level which is bad news for the Bears. I wouldn't be surprised to see Kyle Orton win the job. He ran a fairly complicated offense at Purdue which should make things manageable. The Bears did him a favor by bringing in Muhsin Muhammad. Muhammad can dominate games but he can also disappear for half a season at a time. If he shows up, the Bears might have a respectable passing game.

The Bears have a nice schedule up until November 13. After that, it's brutal. They might start the season off with a few wins but closing out the season against Carolina, Tampa Bay, Green Bay, Pittsburgh, Atlanta, Green Bay and Minnesota will be a deal-breaker. I think they'll be one of the better "bad" teams in the league but they'll need a miracle at the qb position to make it to the playoffs.

Predicted record: 5-11